Saturday, July 24, 2010

Identity Shifts - Who Do You Want To Be?

I recently read a book that is coming out August 17th called "My Formerly Hot Life". I loved meeting the author Stephanie Dolgoff who blogs about the changes she has been experiencing. We all experience changes from who we used to be. When we are young we mostly take it for granted that we won't want to play with dolls or rubber ducks at some point. We grow out of picture books and advance onto novels. Somewhere along the line we start believing ourselves to be something and that gets backed up with evidence. The hot girl/guy, the wallflower, the nerd, the rebel, the artist, the intellectual are all common labels for those who are not steeped in Eckhart Tolle teachings.

We associate with our identity so closely that it can be excruciatingly painful to have it fall apart. If you thought of yourself as a musician all of your life and then cannot make a living with it, realize maybe you are not ever going to play the big gigs you dreamed of and better reside yourself to something else or shift, most people reside themselves and decide to just be who they know themselves to be. Why? Why not put in some muscle and elevate yourself into the next phase of you?? You can be how you would like to be. Remember Newton's laws of motion? Energy will move in the direction it is heading unless something gets in its way. An identity shift takes an enormous kick of energy, but it can be done. An actor who falls into a character has to snap back into the self they know themselves but what if they chose to take on being some of the character instead. Could it stick? Of course it can. We are always going to be the essence of who we are but we all have identity shifts. Some more graceful than others.

Who did you dream of being when you were younger? What would you like your life to look like now. Does the you that you know yourself to be have fun? Have energy and joy? Why or why not? What needs to shift to take on the person being what you want? Are you willing to do what it takes?? I've seen women be so willing to twist themselves into pretzels to please but they forget who they are and have to practice to find their way back to someone they respect and love and who can be loving and filled with joy while giving in certain amounts. Play with your life and don't just settle.

I think Stephanie's little joke about being formerly is good to look at and shift from. A little girl looks at being a big girl and doesn't want to be a baby anymore. Look at what you were formerly as a stepping off place to who you want to be now. Life can get better and better...

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